Friday, January 23, 2009

RIP

"his sad news arrived in my inbox this morning:


pillsburydoughboy.jpg


The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma from complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly-greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities in the food community turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.

The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemimah delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife, Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. 
He is also survived by his father, Pop Tart.

A funeral was held at 3:30 for about 20 minutes, or until done."


davidlebovitz.com   7.15.06

6 comments....porters always have something to say!:

jporterGOP said...

Oh my gosh, that was hilarious.

Jock said...

I ate him for dinner tonight.

curlz said...

Do you have too much time on your hands?

carriegel said...

i didn't write it, i just found it.

megawatt miler said...

finding it means she has too much time

curlz said...

oh i know, sarah. she's always "finding" something.

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